I finally have my music back!
You would wonder when I lost it, which you can find
here. Anyway, I’ve been updating my mobile on the music I
like to listen to and deleting the ones that I skip every single time.
(Everyone has one of those). I added a few more soundtracks to my list, some
violin solos, a little bit of opera with a lot of oldies. It’s been a blast
from the past listening to some of these songs and remembering the first time I
heard them or sang them at the top of my voice with my sister (go check her
out!). And one of these monumental songs: Broken Strings by James Morrison.
I still remember why I loved this song. It originally
attracted me because of Nelly Furtado featuring it. But, that slowly changed to
the brilliant beat of the song and the video was hauntingly beautiful. I don’t
know if I didn’t pay much attention to the lyrics in the tenth grade or just
don’t remember them. But one of the lines struck a chord in me (footnote: Look
ma, a guitar pun!)
Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to save
It's like chasing the very last train when it's too late
When there's nothing left to save
It's like chasing the very last train when it's too late
This song
is most definitely about a relationship that has metaphorically burnt into
ashes and they’re ready to give it up. But, it can be applied to so many
different situations which have nothing to do with romance.
My premise,
as usual, is friendship.
It’s been a
recurring topic of my life. I don’t know if my friends define me, but they
define certain parts of my life. I remember my school due to a group of girls
who wanted to take over the world. Junior college was spent giggling on the
first bench and talking to the teachers very casually because they knew how
sincere my friends and I were. Engineering college: well, it’s still ongoing.
But I can definitely remember them fondly and the experiences we had together
during that period of time.
Sadly, time
is fleeting. It slips away. I think there’s a song like that somewhere, but I
digress. As much as you identify people with parts of your life, you sometimes
lose contact with them as well. It’s not a difficult concept: You don’t meet each
other anymore, you might be in different streams with different schedules, if
not a different lifestyle. Making it work so as to meet your friend becomes
difficult if it’s not a two-way street.
It’s even
worse when you’ve proclaimed a friend to be your BEST FRIEND FOREVAHHHH!
(Everyone has that phase as well). Your neighbours ask you what happened to
that sweet little boy who lived down the street near your old place. There’s a
point of nostalgia where you look through your old pictures and find one of your
group posing cutely. Bonus points if there is a picture just of the two of you
smiling like crazy.
As I said
before, it’s a two-way street. You can’t keep in touch if the other ones
doesn’t want to. Sometimes it’s a game of chicken. Both have issues, and wonder
if the other person doesn’t like them anymore. It is a sad point, but you know
it’s true. That goes on forever, unless one of the aforementioned two actually
goes out on a limb and messages the other. I have been on both sides of this
relationship (read: Platonic, only)
When you
are the sender, you really need to have a strong system of support in case it
doesn’t work out. There are a few ways in which this can pan out
1) There’s only so many times you can
type hi into the chat window till you realize you’re just chatting with
yourself and there’s no reply from the other side.
I love
comparing this situation to a person tweeting a celebrity. I would do it myself, if my sister does not
mock me for tweeting something over and over and over.
2) The other person replies about five
hours later even though they were online in the middle, giving some excuse
about how studies is sucking their life, and then posting pictures of their new
group hanging out.
This
happened to me in the last three months, and thankfully I had wonderful support
in few of my friends, who took me out that evening itself.
3) The other person actually wants to
meet up within the weekend or the next, because they have missed you to all
hell, and just wants to hug you for 10 minutes.
This is my
favourite way for things to pan out. I’m a hugger, and that moment in time
where you can physically affirm your friendship is the best thing in life.
4) Variation on way 3: They say all
this, but then never make solid plans to actually meet.
Apart from
way 3, it’s a very difficult position to be in. Rejection is a state that no
human likes, unless they’re a masochist with respect to feelings. It’s a
slippery slope where one message can make you go search for the ice-cream, or
make you doubt your whole self-worth.
My advice
would be: Keep close the friends who want to keep that connection with you.
It’s the support that will help you later on as you transition through life and
experience strange, new events.
Example:
The friends from junior college? They’re still my best friends. I have a photo
frame of them near my bedside, we meet up for coffee at least once every month,
and celebrate each one’s birthday with much gusto. I talk about all the time in
real life, to the point where people who don’t know them know their names.
As a friend
of mine says: Try your best. If they can’t spare an hour of their time to meet
you, then **** them. You have other friends who love you just as much, if not
more.
