Ridin' on the wind and it never goes away...

You know how people say, “If only my life were a movie and this song would be the soundtrack to it!”

Well, I have one of those conditions pat down. My geekiness over shows and studies doesn’t exactly warrant a movie, but the amount of music I listen to would definitely fulfil the soundtrack portion of it. Just check my music player. You’d be pleasantly surprised at the diversity of genres.

Why this article? I mean, so many others would have made playlists on 8tracks to show their love for their music. This is to show what happens when I am without music.

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

We all know the despair of earphones slowly losing their power. You adjust the wire into the phone so that you can hear the parts of Bohemian Rhapsody playing in each ear. You twist the wire in weird ways to listen to Chester scream out parts of Faint. And most, you keep adjusting so you can avoid weird people noises while travelling home.

In April 2014, my earphones had started reacting on me again. I had a rubberband that I tied the earphones into when it came to the perfect sound that I needed. I pressed the volume button on my phone in vain, that the volume might increase just a tad more. It was submission time, and I needed my music so I wouldn’t freak out over the lack of study in my life.

By the end of May, I couldn’t listen to much music on my phone due to final exams. I managed to listen to it on my laptop. I have about 20 gigs of music on the laptop and 65 on the hard drive (not to brag :P), so it’s easy to choose a particular artist or genre to listen to while studying.

June was done, I was ready for vacation while trying to figure out the earphone problem. Thinking back, I was so dumb. I was blaming the earphones when they were working perfectly on the laptop but not on the phone. I spent all my travel reading A Song of Ice and Fire and fanfiction instead of listening to music. That is exactly when my mood started going downhill.

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~

You must understand, to me, music is actually therapy at times. When I’m feeling sad, or I’ve had an argument with a friend, I’d listen to peppy music or songs that I like to make me feel better. There’s something cathartic about singing Hurricane or Explorers at the top of your voice. When I want to sing along with my family, I play BeeGees and Abba. Singing Don't Stop Me Now at the top of my voice and harmonizing to Waiting for the End with my sister is something I adore.

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

Back to the story. We had to go to Tamil Nadu for vacationing with extended family. I regretted the lack of hearing power in the phone but couldn’t do anything. I let my friend put on her earphones while I continued with my saga of reading books on the bus home.

It came to a point where I was terribly blocked with respect to my writing, just because of my music. The thing that inspires me the most was not there anymore. It was absolute misery. It came to a point where I was worried if I was losing my grip on my creativity.

But now, it is all better. I got my phone repaired last month (I even used a Blackberry for those three days), and I still make the art that I love and write like I usually do. ( I made that scroll below :D)

So, listen to all the music that you do. Don’t let anyone music-shame you, if you like that pop song, turn up the volume and start dancing!

And here is a playlist of my all-time favorites just to shake you up from the doldrums of life:

XO

From Yesterday
Everything I do (I do it for you)
Faith

Guilty all the Same

Happy Little Pill  

Heart on my Sleeve

Heist

Hysteria 
Voulez Vous

P.S. Post title was inspired from Madonna's Music. Sorry for the link heavy post.

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

Music mentioned in the whole post (Alphabetically, then by year):

30 Seconds to Mars
From Yesterday, A Beautiful Lie, 2005
Hurricane, This is War, 2009

ABBA
Voulez Vous, Voulez-vous, 1979

AVICII
Heart on my Sleeve, True, 2013

Beyoncé
XO, Beyoncé, 2013

Bryan Adams
Everything I do (I do it for you), Waking up the Neighbours, 1991 

George Michael
Faith, Faith, 1987 

Linkin Park
Faint, Meteora, 2003
Waiting for the End, A Thousand Suns, 2010
Guilty All The Same, The Hunting Party, 2014

Lindsey Sterling
Heist, Shatter Me, 2014

Madonna 
Music, Music, 2000

Muse
Hysteria, Absolution, 2003
Explorers, The 2nd Law, 2012

Queen
Bohemian Rhapsody, A Night at the Opera, 1975
Don't Stop Me Now, Jazz, 1978

Troye Sivan
Happy Little Pill, TRXYE, 2014

Don't despair; Don't be the lasagna

It is always hard to be that person, the person who is close to someone but the other way ‘round isn’t that true. That’s how life works. It isn’t all puppies and rainbows and OTPs and happiness. Sometimes it’s messy. Even without the added presence of a relationship.

It starts with a mention. It’s fun, to be associated with that person from a whole group. To send them pings and have them ping you back almost immediately. To mention them in almost every conversation and not have it be weird. You’ve considered a relationship, but then you just shrug. Being in a relationship isn’t necessary to have that amount of fun.

You continue this friendship so even your family knows their name, they have your house number, and you can easily talk for hours at a time. You actually have spoken for hours, and it was loads of fun.

Then, there is a new presence. It’s like a shiny object in your peripheral vision, something you want to look at, but ignore thinking it’s not that important to you. Soon enough, there’s cuter pictures of them together, more inside jokes with them than with you. They prefer sitting next to the new person than next to you. They talk regularly despite the distance. Talks of friends teasing them has reached your ears.

It’s not as bad as it sounds. They still talk to you. You still feel hollow, though. You want to ask them about it, but you don’t want to be that clingy person. You have other close friends just as they do. It still stings.

The breaking point is when they have been tagged personally, while you’ve been one of many others tagged. This is the time when you start pulling back, just a teensy bit. It’s not their fault. They just prioritize better, and you didn’t happen to be on that list. Time to not take stuff for granted anymore. Time to get used to them talking about this new friend, maybe more? Time to not get distracted by random stuff that makes you despair, even if only for a little time.

Moral: Even friendships make you doubt, just like relationships. 

P.S. Sorry for the really depressing post. I was in an angsty mood today.

Leaving you with this amazing song: